8th August 2009 – my 16th birthday. Ah good times. Because what I did was…something…..oh wait, I went a – nope that didn’t happen either. OK, I don’t celebrate my birthday. I view at as the most wasteful, self-absorbed day on my calendar but considering I’ve been given money, I decided to hunt for a phone.
Possibly the most stupidest thing I’ve done that day because – you’ve guessed it – I got a Blackberry. At the time, Blackberrys were mainly used by the businessmen and women and wanker-bankers, which is why I was incredibly confused on how my newly-acquired stupid contraption operated. I chose a Blackberry because no-one that I knew of had one. Unfortunately, that isn’t the case and now I’m stuck with this clunky, hypnotising phone until my contract runs out on the 8th.
And what better way to run down the months by listing the annoyance of owning a Blackberry.
1. The Red-Blinking Paranoia. IS IT BLINKING? IS IT NOT BLINKING? OH GOD I DON’T KNOW! WHO TEXTED ME? DID I RECEIVE THAT E-MAIL? PLEASE BBM ME! JUST PUT ME OUT OF MY MISERABLE MISERY!
2. BBM. Thanks for ruining my sleep with your PINGs.
3. One word to describe the App department: shit.
4. Remember the Nokia 3310? Yeah, you can drop it and nothing would chip off. I’m surprised I didn’t kill my Blackberry when I dropped it in the sink though.
5. That annoying clicking sound in the classroom. Everyone is on their Blackberrys: possibly one of the most eerie looking sights and sounds in the techno world.
6. Low battery = constant flashing. I CAN’T TURN IT OFF. WHY?
7. The maps are as useful as a blind guide dog. No, I said find me Kennington Road not HIGH STREET KENSINGTON YOU USELESS PIECE OF CRAP.
8. Ubertwitter, Tube Map & Foursquare. The only 3 Apps out of my 15 that are useful. And no, Facebook is useless. Just like the Tumblr App.
9. Headphones. Look at Apple’s beautiful headphones. White, slick, clean. Blackberry? Looks like a glossed-up pair of Hitachi headphones from Argos priced £3.
10. Texts flies off to no-man’s land. Some texts reach their destination. Some texts end up….somewhere.
11. The web browser. Like waiting for a medium sized JPEG image to load in the 90s on a Windows 98 OS.
12. Hotmail failing to recognise that I deleted that e-mail from both the phone AND my inbox. It’s all about communication. Yet, my Blackberry and Hotmail account don’t get along.
13. It’s called Crackberry for a reason. You WILL get sucked in and there will be no way back until that 24 month contract finishes where you have to constantly pay £32.00 a month or in my case, £40+ plus the time when I had to pay £200 and then £130 in another.
And on the other side of the coin,we have 10 pros for the Blackberry by Survival of A University Student. Enjoy her blog!
‘Til next time,