March |

I just had a quick glance at my clock again and I thought it was 8:15PM. Then I remembered that one night where I lost an hour of much needed sleep and staggered half asleep to Notting Hill…before deciding to recoup that missing hour. Still, it could be worse. You could be singing this song every single Friday and having difficulty which seat to take in a car driven by 13 year olds.

#1 I weep for the Oxford English Dictionary

See what I did there?

_

#2 Pancake Day, Pie Week, Earth Hour, World Water Day – we’re just an inch closer to Piss On A Donkey Day

I prefer Chocolate Day

March: the month where your diet self-destruct and your abs turn into flab. It’s like being back at Christmas. Or your birthday.

#3 I despise Student Finance

This is what I look like when I'm on Direct Gov.

I mess up one teeny-weeny little tidbit on my online application form and I have to fill out an 18 page form just to clear up the problem. What a waste of ink and paper.

#4 Gorillas: Sending seasoned drummers to retirement

Phil Collins announced his retirement this month because he wanted to focus on his family. I for one think a certain mammal ousted him from the spotlight.

_

#5 New Pokemon game. Just one thing: what. On. Earth. Is. That?

Erm....

#6 Leona Lewis voted as most influential woman of past century. Also, Josef Fritzl voted inspirational dad

According to Lewis, she has love related haemophilia

Metro readers have voted Leona Lewis as the most influential woman in London. Right. In the other categories, Paris Hitlon wins the Nobel Prize for nothing, a squirrel receives Nuts magazine’s highest honour and Ashley Cole is awarded the Minor Shot Award from the National Rifle Association.